I am racking my brains trying to come up with a gift for my husband’s birthday. I make a mental list of the various categories – wallets, pens, shirts, belts, shoes, perfumes and watches.
“Ah..that was easy”, I think.
Very early in our marriage, I discovered that my husband is not into surprises at all. He believes that his gifts to me should be chosen only by me..and not by him. And that is how it has been. I have chosen each one of my birthday gifts, and let me tell you, there is a certain joy to be had in choosing one’s own gifts.
So, back to my story. With all the gift-categories in my head, I ask hubby dear to let me know what he wants. I present each category to him.
No. I have way too many.
The ones I have are enough.
The one I have is comfortable.
Why would I want another one?
Don’t wear even the ones I have.
And in a mere two minutes, our gift-conversation is over, and I am back to the same confused state as before.
If the roles were reversed, I would have many more categories, and sub-categories, and specific requirements under each of them. I would spend an entire day mulling over my options on what to buy. Half the excitement is in planning, but my dear husband shows no interest at all.
I feel deflated. My kids are creating or buying their own gifts. They do not include me in their plans – and they are planning Dad gifts, not wife gifts. Sigh!
Later that evening, all of us settle down in the living room, busy with our own work and thoughts.
I ask my husband again about the gift. He says the same thing again – that he does not want anything.
A sly thought creeps into my head and slips out of my tongue.
I say, “Maybe I should buy something for myself to celebrate your birthday.”
My kids are horrified by the sudden emergence of this greedy mom!
“Mom, how could you say this?” they ask, still in shock!
My husband says, “Actually that’s a good idea”.
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My son says, “Mom we will get you a gift for your birthday, but you can’t take away Dad’s gift.”
My husband and I catch each other’s eye and laugh.
And then my husband says, “I will tell you what I want – just cook a special family dinner with all my favourite items.”
And that’s exactly how we celebrate – with yummy food, a delicious cake, lots of love and family time.
Family – the best gift ever.